Well, here goes!
I’m a hopeless romantic, if I say so myself.
My relationships never run on the straight and narrow.
Is this because I have children?
I don’t really know.
But what I do know is that having children makes you stronger when it comes to dating. Not only do you have to protect and take into consideration your own feelings, you have theirs to consider, too.
One thing I have learned during dating while raising my children is that children get attached a lot more easily than you. Men can come and go without you having that attachment, but a male figure around your child often forms an emotional relationship for your child. Ask yourself, do you want that person to be part of your child’s life? Are they a role model you want your child to grow up around?
A big mistake I made in the past was introducing my children too soon, before I had even made that choice or built a strong foundation myself. Yes, this was probably because dating while also being a single mum with two children is hard.
Let’s be real: men need attention (a lot like children). What man wants to date someone they can only see on Saturday nights? Not many — or so I thought. And because I used to crave that adult company, I always rushed.
But seeing the emotional effect it had on my children when things did not always work made me realize that my children were on this wild emotional rollercoaster with me.
I have learned that my children are here forever; they will love and need me, through anything life may throw at me. I have learned to put my time and focus into myself and my children. The right man will understand and accept the time he gets with me as being enough.